I feel a little silly for admitting this, because in hindsight it seems like a silly assumption, but before I had A.J., and in those first few weeks, I thought that once babies started sleeping through the night then they would KEEP sleeping through the night. Now, some 17 months later I can say, "What the heck was I thinking??"
You see, A.J. had us fooled. At 6 weeks he slept for a 6-7 hour stretch. And from 6 weeks until about 4.5 months he continued to sleep in those big stretches at night until he was in a routine of going to bed at 9 and waking up at 6. Then the teething started. And it didn't stop. And our nights of good sleep became fewer and farther between. When he wasn't teething there was always something else to blame the crappy sleep on. Why, oh why, did someone not tell me that sleeping through the night was not a permanent thing?
So what does A.J.'s sleep habits have to do with my grateful spirit today? Well, last night was one of those brutal nights. From about 11pm to 3am he woke up crying every hour. From what I can tell there was nothing bothering him to warrant being awake. Finally, after sleeping in stretches of 30 minutes between his crying jags, I got up with him at 3 and settled on the couch for a little mama cuddles as we call those middle of the night feedings. Within minutes I could tell that he had settled into the deep sleep that had been evading him all night. Back to the crib he went and I crawled into my bed, only to stare at the ceiling for an hour and a half. I think, in total I managed 3 hours of sleep last night.
Enter my beloved red cup. I am proud, and somewhat shocked, to say it has been several months since I visited Starbucks. It is much easier for me to resist the call of the bucks when the weather is warmer. I think my absence made our reunion on this cold dark sleepy morning so much sweeter. If I could have fit through the drive thru window, I would have hugged that sweet barista as she placed my warm red cup of goodness in my hand. I drove home with the heat blowing on my feet, the cup warming my hands, and a smile on my face.
Am I still tired? Heck yes. Are there dark circles under my eyes? Oh yeah. But I'm plugging along. And I am reminded that on some days it is the little things that make all the difference.